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Wednesday, February 2, 2011

And The Tears Keep Coming

I've said before, I am emotionally unhinged at the moment.
My emotional state is in a constant flux thanks to all these extra hormones, and I am driving myself crazy.

Yesterday, The Little One and I went to Walmart.  This is a very routine thing.  On the way there, though, a fire truck passed us.  As we pulled into the parking lot, I see that fire truck and an ambulance at the front of the store. We park and go in.  Just as we are walking in the doors, the Paramedics come wheeling a little girl out on a gurney.  Now, let me say that the little girl looked fine.  She was looking around.  Her mom was ok, just making sure she kept covered as they walked, and they were all walking, not running.  I have no idea what happened.  I would guess some sort of shopping cart incident, but that's just because kids get hurt with those things all the time.  Regardless as to the fact that the girl looked ok, I burst into tears in the middle of Walmart.  It was like someone just flipped a switch.  I think even Ava thought I was crazy.  I was able to calm myself down in a few minutes, but still, I'm surprised that no one said anything to me.  I mean, I could have very easily ended up on that People of WalMart website, and no one wants that.

Then, today, while catching up on a little bit of Internet news and junk, that switched got flipped again.  I started to watch this video about a 3 year old girl who called 911.  As soon as the video started, and they showed the little girl, I started bawling.  The video should be happy.  She saved her mother's life.  She was a hero.  I was crying like a baby over this little girl being a big girl.  It was insanity.

I realize that I can't help it.  I get mad.  I get sad.  My emotions are just all over the place.  Having a ton of outside stresses, like a deployed spouse, certainly doesn't help things.  I mean, its hard to be calm and rational when they leave, and you have two very unhappy children to deal with any time, let alone when pregnant and pumped up on hormones.

To top it all off, I have boxes of cookies everywhere, and I am trying my best not to eat them.  I have to say that isn't easy right now.  I think in my current state, I could probably polish off a box of Thin Mints a day, but I must resist.

Hopefully we can make it through this pregnancy with out any major scenes as a result of my hormones.  I will be as prepared for them as possible.  I have said before, I just need to be able to mumble "Sorry, I'm pregnant" between the sobs.  Hopefully people will just feel sorry for the crazy pregnant woman, and pretend they don't even notice the tears, just like I'm going to pretend it never happened as soon as the tears are gone.

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