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Sunday, June 30, 2013

You Hateful Bunch of .....UUGGH

(Alternative post title: "Don't ever go to CafeMom for support")

I'm not sure how else to say this, but how dare you?  How dare you be such a judgmental bunch of hateful people?
Of course, I'm not speaking to everyone out there in the whole wide world.  I'm speaking directly to those ass wholes (yes I said it) women out there who insist on tearing each other down for no good reason.
This is what I'm talking about.

Now, let me tell you, we all have tough days.  There are many days where I have cried into my pillow at night.  There are many times that I have hated how hard things are sometimes as a parent, but never would I lash out at someone for feeling like that.

What I would do is give this mom a big hug.  Maybe suggest a mom's group which can make a world of difference in your mindset.  Having other mom's tell you its ok and that we have all been there is something we all need to here from time to time.  I might tell her to go see someone, too.  I mean, parenting is hard, and sometimes we can all use a little help.

However, these bitchy moms think what they need is to tear this mom down.  What they need is a good smack of reality.  Words hurt.  A lot.  When you are reaching out for help, they cut like a knife.

These horrible women have wounded a kindred spirit for no good reason other than spite.
To all of you judgement people like that, I hope you never have a bad day.  I hope you never have a day when you need to complain about how awful moments in parenting can be.  When you do have one, I hope you remember how hurtful you were.  I'm sure you are far too self absorbed to realize any of that, though.  So, even though you have done something terrible, i really hope that when you do have a bad day, because we all do, that someone shows you more kindness and mercy than you showed.  The cycle has to stop.
We teach our kids not to bully, and now it's time that the mommy circle learns the same thing.

Thursday, June 6, 2013

I Could Have Sworn I Was Born Here......

I'm going to give you all a little piece of unsolicited advice.  You may do with it what you will, but if you choose to print this out and cram it somewhere, I don't need to know about it.


The advice I am going to give you is absolutly unoversal, and should you chose not to heed it, could make your life much more difficult.

Never.  Ever.  Assume you know where someone is from, where they were raised, how they were raised, or their background.  Always let them, or facts, tell you.  
Assumning you know someone will undoubtedloy get you into troiuble.  Or  fight at a PTA meeting.

Tonight, as I was being jumped on, I was told repeatedly that I didn't understand something because I wasn't from the Bible Belt.  

Ummm........
Wrong.
I was born and raised in North East TN, which is much more of a Bible Belt than this is.  I was raised in a town that had a massive protest when Applebee's tried to open up because the sign was going to say "Bar and Grill" and bars are to be hidden, never put out on display.  This was when I was in High School, too.  Not back in the 50's.
I was raised in a Pentecostal church.  Look it up.  
I get the religious side of things.  
My sister happens to be an associate pastor at her church.  Not that her job means anything as far as my credintials, but I'm pretty sure that if I do something totally antireligious, she is going to call me out on it.  

Howwver, tonight, I kept being told I just didn't understand.  I just don't get it.  I am not from "here".  

I am right now, personally offended.  Perhaps I should take it as a total compliment that people don't view me as being from "here".  After all, if this is the land of religious zealots who don't want to understnad technology for fear that Satan is always behind a cmputer, then I'm good with not being from "here".  

What, you may ask, was all the hub bub about?

Bar codes.  
You know how everyone has a bar code for everything now.  There are bar codes on your grocery store cards.  There are bar codes on every product you buy.  Really, look around, and they are every where.  People even have apps on their smart phones to be able to scan them.
However, when it comes to membership in a organization I am part of, they just won't fly. 
Apparently, people here would totally reject it, and at some point in time in the very contentious discussion, someone likened them to the mark of the beast.  
I kid you not.  
I couldn't make that up.  

All of this was thrown at me, me the person who didn't even suggest car codes but had looked into the feasibility for someone else, because I couldn't understand people.  I am an outsider.  So, I took the brunt of everything.

I may not sound like people do here, or act or think like them.  I may be open to change and multiculturalism, but that doesn't mean I don't know anything about here, too.  I've lived more, experience more, and been through more than many people.
Do not assume you know me.

I get that a lot of crazy things happen in California.  People out there want to ban Oreos, and that stands as evidence enough of some of the goofy things that happen, but goofy things happen everywhere.  Like people flipping out about bar codes.  It just so happens, though, that people in CA wouldn't be afraid of bar codes.  They are much more open to people of different cultures and experiences, because everyone in CA is from a different culture or experience.
So, if you want to call me that mom from CA, go ahead.  I may have been born and raised in East TN, but if being open minded and forward thinking equals being from CA, I'll take it in a heart beat.
In the mean time, if you want to know what I think, how I feel, or about my experience in life, ask.  I'll be glad to tell you.  All the while trying to plan my escape back to California, land of people who embrace bar codes.