Now that is Sexy.

I took the little one to a really big, popular park near the heart of the city. This would be like our Central Park, from New York. It has everything, even a zoo. It is a great place.

Today, as we were running around, I noticed a rather large number of dads there with the kids. No moms, just dads. I was pretty surprised at how many. I started watching them, and I have to tell you, I came to a serious realization today. There isn't much that is sexier than a dad taking his little kids to the park all by himself. Now, I'm not sure why this is sexy. One would think it would be sweet, or maybe endearing, but sexy seems odd. It is, though. Of course it helps if the dad is super cute to begin with, and some today were, but it certainly isn't necessary.

I think, and this is just my guess, that seeing a man being a good father, triggers some urge in us to make more babies. I think it must be some kind of crazy cave man throwback thing, because it really is pretty hot.

I couldn't help sneak glances, and watch some of the dads toting kids around, playing with them, and all that. It was really great to see so many dads taking such active roles with their children. I'm sure a lot of dads do, but still, it is really nice to have it affirmed.

Anyway, it was a really great day at the park in general.

Only later, when I started thinking about blogging this, did the one negative hit me. If I was at the park, thinking about how great it was to watch dads with kids, who is at the park watching my husband, when he takes the girls to play by himself. I bet some woman is out there thinking about how cute an sexy he is, taking his two little girls to the park. Haruphm.

So, to all you other mothers out there, I promise not to oogle your husbands when they are at the park with the kids, as long as you promise not to ooogle mine. Unless, of course, your husband happens to be well built, wearing a white t-shirt, dark jeans, Chuck Taylors, and drop dead gorgeous to boot. You really shouldn't send him out alone, anyway. That one I'm going to notice at the park, the mall, or where ever he happens to be, but I'll try to keep my staring on the DL. Promise.

I have a what??!!??

Let me tell you, husbands, boyfriends, men of the world in general, what you do not, repeat, NOT say to your wife of many years.
The womyn who has given birth to your children.
The womyn who has waited back home, patiently, faithfully, for many, many months, just her and your child, while you were off in another part of the world.
The womyn who has been by your side through thick and thin.

You do NOT walk up to this womyn, put your arms around her in a hug, then look at her face and say "I think your starting to get a unibrow".

When she immediately rebukes you, you then do not proceed to try to explain yourself, and show her the particular hairs you mean. Furthermore, when her temper flairs beyond belief, you don't laugh. Not if you value your life, you don't.

Someone, anyone, should have told this to my husband. I don't know what on this earth (or from far below it more likely) possessed him to say such a thing, but he did.

I told him he may as well go ahead and tell me I look like I have gained weight. Why stop there? Tell me which clothes I wear make me look the fattest, then proceed to trace the wrinkle lines in my face. I mean, why not tear me down???

Why???

"Why would you say such a thing?", I ask him.

"It wasn't mean."

"Now that is just dumb." I don't use that word lightly. In fact, that is probably one of the few, if not the only, times in our years together that I have used that word in direct reference to my husband or his actions. However, I call them like I see them. To think that telling your wife she has a unibrow isn't mean or hurtful, is dumb. It is. You just don't do that. He doesn't tell me how to groom. Why would he start now, there??

In fact, I don't think he even knows what a unibrow really is. What I have, are a couple of hairs that have to be smoothed into place from time to time, especially after I just rolled up out form underneath the dining room table where I was cleaning both the back legs that I can't reach any other way, and the underside of the table lip. Yeah. They might have been a little out of place, but I can't pluck those few long hairs I have, because fact is that with out them, I barely have any eyebrows naturally at all!!!! What you see in pictures is drawn on. My mom is the same way. The older we get, the less we have by way of eyebrow, too. So, unibrow, it was and is not.

Cold shoulder, now that you have. Harumph!!

Just Stirring the Chili!

When I get up, I am just stirring the chili. This by no means indicates that I am done on the computer or that I won't be getting directly back on. This does not mean that you should run from the living room, jump into the big comfy seat where I left it, and slid/roll it over to the computer in some sort of maneuver that for whatever reason makes me think of Tom Cruise in Risky Business. It may just be because you are in your underwear. I'm not sure.

None the less, please don't do this repeatedly. I am trying to multitask. No. M-U-L-T-I-T-A-S-K. I know this is a foreign concept for many out there. It means that i am doing more than one thing at a time. Currently, I am trying to make your dinner and work from our only home computer at the same time.

As an aside, this is my second computer post in 2 days. There seems to be a reoccurring problem here that needs to be addressed. Hmmm.....

Anyway, I will give you time to play on the computer. I know you tell me that your aren't playing, but honestly, checking Slickdeals really isn't honest work. Not for you anyway. If Slickdeals sold military issue helicopter parts, that might be a different story.

So, please, I don't want to nag and ask repeatedly if I can get back to my work. I will tell you when it is time to eat, and I am going to take a break for a while so that you can see if your 1,000 piece Sears Tool kit, or whatever it may be that you are looking for, is on sale at the moment. I promise. Until then, please note that I am just stirring the chili. That siring will will be done before you finish your some what cute slide move and get in position leaning back in the chair.

I lost my authority this morning.

Well, I lost my voice. When you have 2 small children, verbal commands are essential, and losing your voice, seems to take away all of your authority as well.

My oldest is already quite advance in her "I can't hear you" non-listening skills. So, adding into that mix a weak and nearly non existent voice only furthers her amazing abilities.

My youngest is taking after her sibling quite well, and is doing an excellent job realizing that if my voice sounds different, she can really pretend that I just haven't said anything.

The word no doesn't mean much when you sound like some sort of animated character as you say it, I suppose.

Also, my youngest has actually taken it a step further today. She perceives my voice as a sign of weakness. She is correct, but her intelligence is shocking. Not only does she realize that I am weaker, and not as willing to fight, but I think she even realizes that if I am actually showing a sign of weakness, I must be even weaker because she is testing my limits.

I had thought that because she is feeling a little under the weather, too, that she would want to lay around with me, and veg all day. Not that I would want her to feel worse, and mope around, but I had thought there would be snuggling today, not struggling today.

Ahh...it is just all kinds of crappy.

At the very least, I was able to make my husband happy and give him what he really wanted for Christmas this year already: Me to love my voice. That would be one less person to shop for, making me happy.