She Just Won't Talk

I always thought that all of my children would be talkers.  If you know me well, you know I like to talk.  My mother will talk your ear off in a minute.  My sister is a chatty Kat, too.  The Big Girls talk a lot and they both spoke pretty early as babies.  The Big One spoke very early and very well.  Midi not as much, but still pretty early.  My brother, sister, and I were all the same.  My nephew (my brother's son) doesn't stop talking.
I have one nonverbal stick in the mud, though, with The Littlest One.  She won't talk.  She just won't.  She doesn't speak much, and won't use actual words in stead of grunts very often.  I was actually concerned enough to bring it up at her last check up.  I realize that she is the youngest of three, and lives in a house where everyone talks for her. She also still uses a pacifier (Don't judge.  We are weaning off the boob and only one can go at a time.)  So, I get that all that means she will talk later, but this is driving me crazy.  At her age, The Big One would already make two or three word sentences.  "Cup, please" and sentences like that were easy for her.  Midi spoke early enough and well enough that I was never concerned.  The Littlest One, though, makes me try very hard not to be worried.  Her pediatrician went over a secondary developmental assessment with me, and she was great.  The only indicator of a developmental issue she pegged on was the question about whether or not they stare off at nothing.  She does.  All the time.  More so than the other two did.  The Dr began to question me about it, and ascertained that she does it while pointing to the nothing she is staring at, and trying to show it to us.  Freaky, but no longer an indicator if she communicated with us in some way during the process of seeing things we don't.

     The thing is, she does communicate.  She knows body parts already and will point to the one you ask.  She can follow commands, like "Get your hand out of my shirt" or "Take that to the trash".  So, her language skills are there as far as understanding words.  She just won't speak.  I will occasionally hear her say a word, a big word even, and then never say it again.  It is as if she is torturing me and being incredibly obstinate with full realization of what she is doing.  Perhaps she is aware that I want her to talk and won't.  That would seem to go right along with her personality so far.  So far, I have her pegged as being the most difficult child in regards to behavior   Not that she is a terror or anything, but because she constantly does things for a reaction   She already knows what she isn't supposed to do, and looks you straight in the eye and does them, while laughing, to get you to come after her.  She is a constant joy, I tell you.
Probably in a year or so, I will come back and tell you this is all cleared up, and she won't ever stop talking, just like her sisters.  Maybe by then she will be driving me insane with the almost three year old constant conversation.  Hopefully.  

She did it!!

I don't want to jinx myself, but....the little one is asleep!! Can you feel my joy?? I am so excited!! She just lay down, and went to sleep. She ask me for her pa once, and I told her no. She whined for about a minute or two, and went to sleep!!!

It is too early for me to sleep too, or I would. I have no idea what I am going to go do right now, but this is so cool!!!!

Thanks for sharing in my moment!!

The End of A Pa-Era

Well, hopefully, this is the end.

The Little Onehas a well established pa-habit. Recently, she starting biting through the nipples. I realize that is a sign they probably need to go, but I am not about to push it. The child need her safety binkie right now, and I had no intentions of taking that away.

Instead, I have been constantly telling her, warning her really, that if she bit through them, they went into the trash. I told her that once they were all gone, that would be it. My intentions were of course not the same as my words. As I said, I have no desire to push this issue at the present time. I plainly intended to sneak a new pack into our shopping cart the next time we were at Wal-Mart. We are, in fact, as least 3 days really past due for that shopping trip. We are all sick, and San Diego happens to actually be in the midst of long lasting rain front. So, we haven't gone anywhere. No new pacifiers (pas).

Over the last 2 weeks or so, we have thrown away at least 4 pas. I watched as our supply was dwindling, not worried as I new we needed to go out soon, anyway. Saturday, when I had the new baby sitter over, I remembered to show her the stash in a cubbard, and told her to break into it as needed. Well, the little one was a little wild that night, and by the time I got home, we were on the last one!! We didn't go out yesterday, or today. I thought we could make it until tomorrow.

Don't bite, I kept reminding her. Hoping that she could just make it with out destroying this one.

Shortly after she woke up from her nap today, she ask me to wash her pa. When I took it, I saw she had bitten into it and torn it already.

"Oh no. You bit it. Momma has to throw it away."

She reached over and very gently took the pa back. She looked at it for a second, then put it in her mouth.

"No. No trash pa." She said around it.

"Yes. You know that if you bite them, they have to go in the trash. They aren't safe anymore."

"No good?"

"No."

"Trash?"

"Yes. Trash."

She looked up at me with those big round eyes, very solemn and sad. She walked over to the trash cabinet, opened it, looked at me one more time and ask "Trash?" again.
"Yes. Trash." I told her. I was never mean about it, just sort of sad myself.
She dropped it in.

"New one?"

"No. We don't have any new ones. All the new ones are at the store, and we aren't going to the store."

"Go." She walked quickly over to the shoe basket and started to put her shoes on.

"No, Ava. We aren't going to the store. No new ones."

She didn't say anything. She just sort of looked at me with this resigned look, then walked out to the living room. There were several times today where she went to go get her jacket, and ask for a new one. I just repeated the same answer very gently all day.

"No new ones."

She whined for it just a couple of times, but then after I reminded her they were gone, she remember she threw it away, and she would move on.

So, now it is bed time. I have her laying down. I gave her a cup of water. I know, it isn't good to replace one bad habit with another, but I am not looking for a fight. If not, I'll be up all night looking for one. I know I am in for a few days of less sleep, but in all honesty, it won't be that different than any other night for me of late.
I feel bad for her. I didn't want to take her security object away until her Daddy came back, but I guess she is ready. My baby is becoming a big girl.

I hope you sleep well tonight big girl. You can still bunk with me for a while, at least.

Our Little Paddict

My husband and I did a bad thing today, but we couldn't help ourselves.

We fed an addiction.

A pa addiction to be more precise.

Pa is what my youngest, and everyone else in the house, calls her pacifier. She is an addict. She is in the throes of a real, and hard core addiction. It is scary.

Today, she lost the last pa we had. She lost it on the way home from picking up our oldest daughter from school. We walk everyday. So, somewhere out there, between our home and the school, lies a little green pa with tons of teeth marks, and probably tons more germs.

We should have let hat be that, and ended it there and now cold turkey. We aren't strong enough, though.

She is 19 months old, and it is high time that she gave that thing up. The problem is, though, that we aren't committed to working through the addiction at this point. There would be several withdrawal symptoms. Those would lead to a sever withdrawal of the amount of sleep that my husband and I get, and we just aren't completely committed to that.

We are also stuck in a very difficult position. My husband is preparing to deploy for an extended period of time. We can either force her to give up the pa now, when she really isn't ready, and deal with the long hard struggle in the short amount of time that he has left, or we can allow her to have it, and wait it out until her gets back. The second option would leave her with the pa until she was 2 and 1/2 at least. That isn't really something we believe in, but as of right now, it is the choice we are making. The lesser of the two situations, and the one we feel we can deal with better.

I know, I know. We should just do it, but we just can't. On top of all the stress it would bring right now, she is probably our last baby. It hurts my heart to force her to grow up faster than she is ready to do.

So, for now, we feed the addiction. My husband ran frantically to the store to get a new pack of pas for us. As soon as she saw them, she squealed with delight. "Blue Pa!" She said. So, now, she walks around with a fresh new and much less germy blue pa hanging from her mouth. I know it isn't great, but at least it is quiet around here.