Teachers Aren't Mean

I'm going to share something that I hope doesn't get people upset.
I know, as a parent, we hear about "mean" teachers all the time.  You know those teachers that yell, a lot.  Those teachers that don't seem to let their kids wiggle an inch without being all over them.

I get it now.

I mean, I know there are exceptions to every rule and sometimes, there may be a person out there who really is mean.  It happens.  We all wish it didn't, but it does.  I'm not talking about those people who end up on the news, because they are generally bad people, I'm talking about your every man or woman teacher who seems just to be grumpy with the kids.

This year in my troop, I have about 32 girls.  I have parents in the room with the troop and I, but let's be honest, there are many days where I feel likes its me versus them.
It isn't that I think we have an adversarial relationship.  I love those girls.  Its that I feel like I'm fighting the ocean sometimes.  I have good control.  I can usually keep them quiet, but this year, it feels a little more overwhelming than it ever has before.
I have a few that I Think are trying to give me a coronary.  I isn't that they are bad, but that they can't be still.  I mean, we meet right after school.  Those kids are tired of still.  Unfortunately, our programming needs some still in it.  It also needs some quiet.  Let me tell you how well that works.
It doesn't.
I try to adapt, but I swear there is only so much i can do.
We use a call and response for me to snap them back to attention.  Its one of those things where I yell something, and they yell something back.  We have a million of them, but my favorite is:
me: "Hocus Pocus"
Them "Everybody Focus".
Its cute, right? 
Until the 15th time in a single hour. 
Then, I get that the magic in my hocus and my pocus is just gone.

At that point, and on days like today, where I have seriously told one child to leave the P.E. teacher's bones alone no less than 5 times, separated 3 groups of kids, and found myself with a buddy (aka you cant sit by anybody but me today) all within an hour and a half that I totally get the "mean" teachers.
They can't help it.  They aren't mean, they are tired. 
They aren't mean, but they are sure that if they give an inch, someone is going to take that inch and find a way to turn it into a mile of crazy. 
They are frustrated.

See, I'm in this position because we don't have enough volunteer parents.  Like I said, I have parents in the room, I am required to, but I'm talking about parents that want to get into the thick of things and really volunteer.  So, I take all comers, hold on for dear life, and hope for the best.  It isn't always what i would want, but at least they get something instead of nothing. 

Teachers are in this position because no one who decides how many kids in a class is appropriate has ever stood in front of 27 kids who just don't get what you are putting down and you are the one who has to figure out how to feed it into 27 different minds with different learning styles simultaneously, while dealing with those kids who have special needs, kids who have home life problems, kids who need to wiggle and jump, and so on, and so on. 
I would be mean, too.  Every day of my life. 
I remember when I was in elementary school, we had like 20 kids, at most, to a class, and there was a teacher's assistant.  Remember those wonderful ladies?  They did the prepwork,  helped out kids who needed it, and so on. 
No, forget the assistant, and in some schools parents aren't even allowed in any more. 

I think, if we want to find ourselves without mean teachers, we need to refocus and change our thinking.  It isn't a problem with the people we are hiring (exceptions noted), but with the conditions we put them in. 
I don't want to be a mean Scout leader, but I also don't want to have to yell "macaroni" (the correct response from my girls is "Cheese") 25 times in an hour to try to bring some semblance of peace back into a room.

We, as a society need to really take the time to tell our elected officials what we want in our schools, and even more importantly, we need to urge them to find ways to pay for it.  I know that is a whole other post, but I really think our kids and our teachers are worth it. 

Think about it.  If you could pay an extra $100 a year in a tax that went just for schools to be able to keep there from being "mean" teachers any more, wouldn't you?  I would.  No doubt.  If in that hundred you can also find me an assistant troop leader, that would be great.  My girls and I would all appreciate it, greatly. 

Old Age is Hard on Scouts

     I am writing this blog as a plea to the general, cookie buying, public.  I know those cute little girls in the blue and brown Girl Scout uniforms are hard to resist when they ask you to buy cookies.  I know those big doe eyes on a 5 year old make it impossible to say no.  I know because I have one.  I'm glad their cuteness works and you stop to buy a box of cookies even if you don't want it.
     In our troop, we are thankful for every box sold.  I want to ask you, though, please, please, don't pass up the older girls.  Teenagers are hard.  I know, I have one of those, too.  As a troop leader, its even harder to keep the older girls engaged.  They have so much more to do between school work, many after school activities, and having a normal teenage social life.  So, to see them continue to invest in a program that is teaching them to be strong women who will change the world makes my heart soar.  The Biggest One is now a Cadette in Scouts.  She wears the tan uniform, usually with a cat ear headband, and she looks like she is 15, even though she isn't.  She is smart, funny, and driven.  She already has a plan for her life that I wish I had at her age.  This year, she is implementing that plan by going to a special camp where she will start as a councilor in training.  Her plan is, by the time she turns 16, be a junior camp counselor, and at 18, be a Girl Scout camp counselor all through college each summer for her summer job to help pay for books.
     The thing is, this camp is expensive.  Even more so than a normal scout camp.  In fact, most of her activities are more expensive as an older scout.  So each and every one of those boxes of cookies she sells are vitally important to her.  She needs to raise the money to be able to get to her camp, learn more about astronomy with trips to the closest observatory, as she is still trying to decide between astronomy and microbiology as degree and career path (she is leaning toward microbiology as she wants to be able to research lupis and find a cure or treatment that actually works).  Knowing that she needs to sell more, she works harder.  She works with every one of those little doe eyed girls and shows them how to sell cookies.  She teaches and trains them like a champ.  After all, she has been selling since she was a little doe eyed 5 year old.  She is willing to go house to house for hours.  She will work every single booth sale I allow her, in between play practice on weekends and all county band.  Even with all that hard work, she can't sell as many as the cute little girls do.  For some reason, it is easier to say no to the older girls. I guess you think they can take it. The last time she went door to door, she went to street after street, and only sold 5 boxes.  Hours of work for 5 boxes.  She was ready to go out for more, though.  She wants that sale.  Same thing happens at both sales.  I pair her with a little one as often as I can so that the sales are higher for her.  She knows it, too, but she doesn't let it stop her.  I respect that drive, and I wish every one out there would, too.
     So, the next time a girl in a tan uniform knocks on your door, please open it and consider buying a box.  If they are still selling by the time they look like they are about to drive, it means they are strong, dedicated girls who will be the next leaders and game changers of our world.  Consider that dedication, and buy a box, even though they don't have doe eyes, even though they may be as tall or taller than you, and even though they might wear cat ears when they ask.  I promise it means as much if not more than the box you buy from the cute little bitty ones.  Don't stop buying from the cute little ones, either.  I'm just saying, a scout is a scout, and consider your purchase equally.  After all, I have three girls, from the cute little doe eyed one in a blue uniform, to a middle aged (for scouts) girl in the Girl Scout green uniform, up to my oldest in the tan.  She is almost as tall as me, which is another of her life goals, but don't let that stop you.  Buy a box.  Please.  I promise she will say thank you.

If you want to buy any boxes from any of my girls, you can buy from the littlest one here.

You can buy from the middle one (she is pretty cute, too, though I didn't get to talk much about her in this blog) here.

And last, but not least at all, the biggest one here.

No matter who you buy from, what council, what age of girl, I appreciate each of you who buy cookies, and please, don't forget that if you can't eat them, you can treat them to members of the military by donating cookies.  (Cookie donations to the military are also tax deducible if your into that kind of thing!!)

Thanks again, and try the new S'mores cookie.

I DARE You to Protest Me

I got a really interesting email from my local Girl Scout Council today.  Apparently, someone out there is trying to make a stink about how Girl Scouts supports abortion.
Right.
Totally.  We talk about it every day.  I personally try to sneak in as much about abortion into our curriculum as I possibly can.  I teach them how to plant a seed, and then deceptively tell them its ok to pluck the seed if it sprouts up when you don't want it.

No.  Wait.  We DON"T do that at all.  In fact, one of the things that I LOVE most about Girl Scouts is their policy of having no policy.  See, Girl Scouts keeps that idea that some conversations are better left to each family, and have no place in Scouting.  This topic being on of them.
That makes me happy as a parent, not just a scout leader.
Girl Scouts adheres to the basics, supporting your community, growing up to be a strong, self confident your lady, things like that.  Everything else is left up to each parent.

The email I received in a way, let us know that people might try to talk to us about these views at cookie booth sales.  The letter said that we didn't need to talk back, but we could if we wanted to, and it give us a direct link to the online post causing the stir, as well as the real information on the official policy.  Basically, it let us know that we may encounter protests.  At a cookie booth sale.
Seriously.
No.  Really.

So, here is what I have to say to all those who might want to protest.
1.  Leave my girls alone!!
You want to see me go momma bear, go after my cubs.  (I know we aren't Cub Scouts, but I thought that would be cute here.)  Every single one of the girls in my troop becomes mine the moment they join.  You will not harm them in any way, that includes scaring them.  Nope.
2.  If you do want to engage, you engage me.  Just me. I will respond.  I will be prepared.  I will let you know in no uncertain terms that you are not only ignorant of the truth, but totally absurd for believing that Scouts would actually teach something like that.
3.  Recognize that the entire purpose of Girl Scouts is to raise strong young women who will stand up for themselves and what they believe in.  The Biggest One is a prime example.  Since she is mine, I'll let you try this one out.  Go ahead and tell her that you think Scouts is teaching her to murder children.  Then, be prepared for the wrath that ensues.  In that moment, I'll give her a pass on respecting her elders.
4.  One other "little" belief you may have missed is that we support God and country.  I think you will find, at least in this area, that many of the families of my girls are rooted in the Christian faith.  So, you are totally barking up the wrong tree here.

Some people have lost sight of Jesus in the name of Christianity.  If you think for a moment that the right thing to do is to go after a group if Girl Scouts in regards to abortion, then you may as well go join the Westboro Baptist Church.  That is their mentality.  If you think for a moment that it is ok to scare small children, then you are the one who deserves judgement, not a parent who is working to help her child go to camp.
What you need to do is sit in on a Scout meeting.  See what we really do and who we really are.  My girls are awesome.  The other ladies I work with are awesome.  My goal at every single meeting and in between is to do anything I can to support them in reaching their full potential.  I want them to learn.  I want them to grow.  I want to see the amazing people that they will become.

I hope they are all life long scouts and are always just as proud of the organization as I am.

Oh, Boy Scouts, You Keep on Breaking My Heart

You know, I hate to say it, but the Boy Scouts just keep breaking my heart.
I love Scouting.  I really, really do.  I see all the good it can do in a child's life, and I believe in that good. I want to see that good.
It's hard, though, when the organization that is supposed to do all that good keeps doing things that make me sad.
The Boy Scouts have banned obese kids from their Jamboree this year.  This makes me very sad.

I love Girl Scouts.  I realize that no organization is perfect, it isn't possible, but Girl Scouts does so many things right.  My girls love it.  The Biggest One just came back from a week at camp, and she has decided that she wants to get her Gold Award, stay in scouts until she graduates from High School, and then work at the camp during the summer as her job when she isn't in school.  She loves it that much.

So, I looked at her, and told her, very basically, about what the Boy Scouts just did.  I didn't tell her who had done it.  I ask her if the Girl Scouts did this, how would she feel.  She immediately started to tear up. Her heart broke.  She said it was incredibly mean to leave people out like that.
I let her know that Girl Scouts didn't really do that, but Boy Scouts did.  We talked about it.  The Biggest One thought that was a horrible thing to do.  The Boy Scouts think that their new rule will be a motivational, and make the kids want to lose weight to go.  So, I ask her, would she be willing to work harder to go to camp, if there was a rule like this that would affect her, mind you she isn't obese at all.  She said it would make her not want to go to camp all together.  She wouldn't even want to be a part of it.  This, from the same child who just told me her goal was to be a part of that same camp forever.

See, Boy Scouts, you did it all wrong.  How about letting the fat kids come, and then trying to get them to be healthy there.  Did you also ban obese Scout Masters?  I mean, if you want to set a good example, how about starting there?
The Boy Scouts don't really have a good history with banning people. Perhaps they should have thought about how a ban on anyone worked out for them in the past, and considered the fact that bans on segments of your population tend to divide and not bring people together in a positive way.

Right now, I am doubly thankful for fact that I don't have to deal with all of this.  Girl Scouts wants to bring us together, not tear us apart, and I love them for that.
I sincerely hope that The Boy Scouts get things figured out quickly.  Like I said, I love scouting.  I love what it has the potential to do, and i would love to see that potential be brought back in all its glory with The Boy Scouts.

Teaching Our Children To Stand Up To The Man

There are days when I am definitely My Father's Daughter.  Granted, I am always biologically his, but some days, I act just like him as well.  My Father is a grouchy, mean old man, whom I love.  He taught me a lot of things.  Some good.  Some my mother doesn't appreciate.  One of the best lessons he ever taught me, though, is to stand up for what you believe in, no matter what or to whom.  He taught me that elected officials put their pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us, and their door, or email inbox, should always be open to us.
Right now, I am going through the process of trying to get the great city of Chattanooga to change a city code that will disqualify many of our recently retired veterans from serving as police officers or fire fighters.  Basically, to be employed for either, you mist be totally through training and hired before you turn 40.  When a person enters the military at 18, they can retire 20 years later at the age of 38, possibly very closed to 39.  The hiring process is very long, often taking up to, or even longer than a year for police officers.  That means, you will be 39, pushing 40, by the time you are even approved for a police academy.  Then, you have to wait for an academy to start.  In all that time, most recent retirees will age out of eligibility, since the training itself take yet another 5 months, and you must be done before you turn 40.  I find it absurd that the city would toss aside so many people who would be invaluable to them in either department.  Turing 40 doesn't mean you can't still be a vital member of the police department.  Far from it.   In fact, with the experience that many people walk away from the military with, they would only make the police department better for it.  Where else are you going to find so many people who are completely prepared to make tough decisions under extreme pressure?  They are generally all very familiar with small arms, something a police officer needs to be very comfortable with.  I could go on, and on about how their experience would be beneficial to the department, but I think it is really very obvious.  They would make great police officers, especially those who have any military police training.
However, this city code will preclude so many of them from being up to get into the department on such a tight time frame.
So, I want it changed.
I also have a special drive for this because it does affect my family directly.  I don't want to go into that right now, but I think you can figure it out.

I've already started contacting the mayor and City Council members.  I've started a petition that I plan on taking to a council meeting as soon as I have enough signatures.  Please, sign it.  Sign it.  Share it.  Send it to anyone you know.

As a side goal in this whole process, and something that gets me all worked up in a good way, I want to involve my children.  I want them to watch their mom in action and see that anyone can try to change the way things are run.  "We the people.." isn't just in our governing documents for great literary effect.  It is there because regardless as to how they make us feel sometimes, we need to remember that we elect people.  We should drive policy, not the policy makers themselves.  I want my girls to see it, and feel it.  I want them to stand up for what they believe in, and work to change what they don't.

I want my Girl Scout troop to participate with me, too.  I want them to sit in on the council meetings that I go to.  I want them to watch me speak, and learn that they can do anything and be anything they want to.

This is one time where my dad taught me everything just right.  Thanks, Dad, and I promise to pass the lesson on to the best of my ability.

My Annual Cookie Plea

So, every year since I think I started blogging, I have blogged about the woes, and sometimes the highs, of the Girl Scout cookie selling process, all the while, really hoping that someone will jump up, feel the strong pull of the spirit of giving, and contact me asking to help out.  I fully expect to share a woe filled post later, as I am again being the cookie mom for my brand new troop, of all most all new kids and parents who are scared to death of selling cookies.  However, I'm not here to cry, yet.  I'm here to get rid of the thin veil usually covering my plea, and just come right out and beg.

If anyone who reads this would like to help out our troop, I have a great, tax deductible  way to do so.  This year, brand new to our Council, is a program called Building A Mountain of Hope.  It is a long and rather confusing name for a program that is really pretty great, and simple.  You can purchase a box of cookies that we will donate to the Tennessee National Guard.  The Guard can then send them to their troops who are deployed over seas or use them for Disaster Relief, etc.  I think it is awesome, and nearly as great as Operation Thin Mint back in San Diego.  Nearly.
Anyway, if anyone would like to support my troop, and Girl Scouts in general, while getting a nifty little tax deduction, please, please (see the begging) contact me.  Along with your tax receipt, I'll send you a very nifty little thank you note hand made by one of The Big Girls!
Thanks for at least reading this, and hopefully thinking about it.

I Am Not A One Woman Army

If there is one thing I learned from my many years of leading a moms group, it is that building a good organization takes a great team.  One person, no matter how dedicated they are, can not do it all, at least not with out driving themselves into the ground, or taking speed, or both.  (The speed is a reference to an episode of Desperate Housewives, back when I used to watch.) You see, I tried to do everything when I first started up the group, and that just wasn't working for me.  Once I realized that I needed help, and I got great help, the group started to flourish.  It takes both a dedicated leader and people who are willing to pitch in to make something really work.
So, I take all of that with me as I move forward in my volunteer career.   I just started a Girl scout troop for both my girls, as there wasn't one that could take them.  I am fully aware of how much I need help.  I could try to do it all, but there are a few problems with that.  First, Girl Scouts won't let me.  It is against the rules for there to be only one adult present at get together.  We must have at least two non related adults.  That means my husband can't count, even if he is registered as a co-leader since he will be with us a lot (he happens to also be first aid trained and a great resource for many of the outdoor skills I want to teach the older girls).  Still, we need other adults to pitch in.
Second, I have a life to live, and need to do so.  When I first started my moms group, I let it run my life, and that wasn't good for me.  I had to learn that the hard way.  I tried to do everything and please everyone, but that didn't work. I made a lot of mistakes, and it took me a long time to realize just how thin was too thin when it came to stretching myself.
I want help.  I welcome help.  I actually am begging for help, but the parents have to be willing to give it.  Some will freely.  Some will when forced.  Some just don't want to.  That makes me sad.
I don't run a troop for myself.  I do this so that my girls can have a fantastic experience.  I want them to have a full child hood, and to me, this is just a part of it.  I know that it takes work, and I am willing to give that, for them.  I wish all my parents felt the same way.  Like I said, some will, and some...well, I hope I can enrich their daughters' lives as much as humanly possible for this one woman.

And Now They are All Crying

Mondays are Girl Scout days around here.  We spend most of the day prepping for Scouts, and then we have meetings at 4pm.  Even dinner revolves on Scouts on Monday, because I generally go for the crock pot so that we are ready to go as soon as the last girl leaves.
Today, was supposed to be just another meeting.  We were to focus on our cookie goals.  The whole cookie process, much as I loathe it, is designed to be a teaching tool for the girls.  The money they earn is to be ear marked for both community service and fun stuff.  So, before the season starts, we pick a community service project that we will be spending our proceeds on.  I take suggestions from the girls, and then see which ones are actually feasible (we physically build houses for people that don't have any, not right now anyway) and then they get to vote on them and decide for themselves what to do.  I love that part of everything, and it is probably one of the only reasons I actually go through with all this.
To get to all those great ideas, though, requires a lot of thought and work from the girls.  They have to identify who they want to help, and how.  Can we do it?  We will we have the money?
The fist thing we do is have a brainstorming session.  I go round and round, asking each girl for a new idea until they just run out.  Then ,we go through the list.  Tonight's idea's were interesting.  We had a huge discussion about buying goats for families in Africa.  The next idea was much more tame.  Someone wanted to do something to help the deployed troops.  Very nice.  One little girl, the only one in my entire troop not from a military family, raised her hand and ask what that meant.  I ask the girls who could explain it to her.  Every other hand shot up.  Since her father is actually deployed at this moment, I let The Big One explain.  She got about one sentence out before she broke down.  I believe all she said was "Sometimes, Dads have to leave to...." That was it.  That was all she could say.  She was sobbing nearly instantly.
The girl who ask looked shocked.  She didn't understand.
Since we were all sitting together on the floor, I schooched over to The Big One, put my arms around her, petting her head, and told the other little girl that sometimes, moms and dads have to leave.  They have to travel around the world to fight for our nation, to keep us safe, and do lots of important jobs.  Its hard when they do, because we miss them so much, but they have to go to keep us all safe.  They will come back as soon as they can, though.  Then, I leaned in and whispered to The Big One that we are almost done.  He will be home soon.  I just repeated that and petted her.
I looked up, and everyone else was in tears.  Her best friend, who's father just came home a few weeks ago, was sitting in her own mother's lap, crying.  Her mom just happened to be the parent there tonight to stay as the second adult.  The mom had tears in her eyes.  I look beside me, and the other two military girls are also about to cry.  The Big One couldn't calm down.
So, I just stopped the meeting.  We were going to try the new flavor of cookie, and a few others just for a refresher, anyway, and that was that. I made them wash hands, line up, and move rooms.
Change the scene and the focus immediately.
Having a troop of little girls who's fathers may leave at any time isn't easy.  They all share the pain.  Being a military child in general is such a hard life.  They didn't choose this life.  We, as parents, chose it for them.  So, we have to be there, and try our best, to comfort them, and help them through the path we chose for them.  I will always do my best to comfort my own, and any of them who are heart broken, with cookies, or hugs, or what ever it takes.
We will hope for a better meeting next week. Hopefully, we can focus on our goals, or start working on our badge, but if we are in need, I know where I can get some more cookies.

I Have a Beef With Cookies

If you read my last post, then you know where this is headed.  Cookie season in Girl Scouts has got to be one of the most stressful things ever.
Cookies haven't even started yet, and already this has been a bumpy roller coaster ride.  From one low, into a loop de loop, straight to a huge, stomach tossing dip.   I found a parent to go.  I am so incredibly thankful for her.  After all the scrambelling and worrying I did over the last 24 hours, trying desperately to find someone to go in my place to the Cookie Lottery, I moved from stressed out to pissed off. I offered childcare to everyone in the troop, but she managed to get it worked out on her own at the last second.  She was going a little late, but she would go.  She is also the newest parent to all of this that I have.  She doesn't have any training in cookies, and has never been part of the process before, but she was able to go.  She did the best she could, and that is all I could ask of her.  What raises my ire is that when she got there, there were children at the event.  I was told specifically that there were to be no children, and we struggled with it, yet people were allowed to come in.  I had to send the only person i could, and our girls were seriously disadvantage by having someone with no experience go, in order to follow the rule.

The women there weren't even all that nice to the parent i sent.  In a fantastic display 0of immaturity, other women were taking up seats with their purses, just so no one could sit beside them and leaving no open seats in the hall for my parent.  The process has become so competitive that people forget we are all supposed to be "a sister to every Girl Scout".  That is something we have our girls say at every meeting. I know that in our troop in particular, we are very focused on that.  I want the girls to learn to be good sports, and compete to the best of their ability, but without a malicious undertone.  It can be done.  We try to focus on how cookies help every girl, and not just our troop.  We want them to see the greater good of the whole process.
The whole process, all of cookies sales, is what I dislike most about Girl Scouts.  So many times, I wish we could skip it, but there are valuable lessons to be learned if we choose to focus on them.  I am going to do my best to do just that.  In fact, I suppose I should make this a learning opportunity for myself.  I really need to learn to ignore all the bad behaviour that I see from other adults, not let it get to me so much, and focus on making this great for my girls.  For those who have lost sight of what cookies should be, well, Bless their Hearts, I hope they do great and get out of it whatever they want, too.

One Of THOSE Nights

Tonight sucks.  Totally sucks.  It really sucks to have my husband gone right now.  This time, it isn't because my children were off the wall today.  Actually, considering everything we had to do they were pretty good.  It isn't because, yet again, he missed a really special moment.
This time, its because sometimes day to day life is hard, and you need a partner to be there for you.  When you are married or in a committed relationship, you expect to have that, and when you don't it hurts sometimes.

I know that being a military spouse, we usually don't say a lot.  We just suffer in silence, or relate our sadness to those who are in the same situation.  We don't complain  about how absolutely horrible it can be at times, and it is.  At least, I can tell you that I usually don't say much.  I tell people "Its fine", "We will make it", or some other very white washed expression of how I feel.  I know that I will make it.  I don't have a choice.  I have to continue on, but sometimes, like tonight, I just want to cry myself to sleep.  Unfortunately, I can't because I have too much to do to even sleep.

Girl Scout Cookie sales start at the end of this month.  Thanks to military downsizing, I lost our troop leader very suddenly over the Christmas break.  My world was instantly screwed.  Her world much more so, I'm sure, but still.  She and I worked together on everything last year.  We make a great team.  Our husbands are fantastic Girl Scout dads, and they pitch in every where they can.  So, I went from a team of four to get cookies done, to me.  Just me.  Saying that I feel overwhelmed doesn't even begin to cover it.
I have had to beg and plead to get my training.  Though I managed cookies last year, I was still required to go though the multiple hour cookie training again this year.  Problem is, this year, I have an infant.  Cookies are in general a no children allowed process.  No children at training.  No children at the Booth Sale Lottery.  No children at cookie pickup.  You get the idea.  The only times we can have any children with us are when we are selling the cookies, and it is supposed to be just the Girl Scout selling, no siblings, or tag-a-longs as they call them, at all.  This includes infants strapped to your chest in carriers.
I managed to beg a parent into going to the training for us, just so that we could sell.  Now, I have to get the rest done.
My husband is gone.  My co leader is gone.  I have no family here.  I can't leave my breast fed, straight up clingy 8 month old with a sitter.  I'm screwed.
No one gets that, either.

You would think that most people in charge who work with the scouts have children themselves, and would be more understanding.  Not so.
Tomorrow morning is the big Booth Sale Lottery.  This is a huge deal in the cookie world.  This is when we get to select our locations for selling cookies.  If you don't go, you don't get booths.  If you do, you get the crap left over at the places that don't sell that no one wants.  Some of them even come with notes about which way to face to avoid the loads of indigent people that will be around.  Really, I don't want girls there.  So, going to this lottery is vital to each troop.
However, again, I can't take the baby.  I can't leave her with any one.  So, I can't go.The parent that helped me before has no child care for tomorrow.  He can't go.  I have a small troop.  Most of my parents are in the same situation I am, mostly military families with no one here to help out.
So, were all screwed.
What really upsets me is that this year, my parents are willing to put in the work because they all want their children to earn camp, but we are all hurt by a system that isn't understanding of our situations.  If we don't get these booths tomorrow, no one will earn camp.  We won't be able to sell enough cookies to do it.  There is no way.  None of us have childcare.  None of us can go.
I need my husband.  Not just tomorrow, but for this whole process.   I need someone here tonight to tell me just to breath, and that we will figure it out.  I need someone to have my back.
I don't though. Not right now. Not for a little while longer.
This is a hard life.  Nights like tonight, when you just need a hug, are the hardest.

So, its back to stressing out about what to do, and trying to find someone, anyone, to help out.

Yes, I look forward to his retirement.  I look forward to having him home, and being able to get that hug anytime I need it.  No matter what, though, for the rest of my life, I will always be understanding of those who are in the same situation I am in right now.  I will always extend my hand, or do anything I can, to help those who don't have the support they want and need because they are military families.
Tonight, I'm sending out lots of love and virtual hugs to all the military spouses sitting a home while their spouses are gone.  Much love to you all, and speedy return so that you too can get a hug, and maybe even a kiss.

Off to Camp

Today was a huge day around here.
The Big One went off to camp today.  Not day camp, or just overnight camp, but we wont see her again until Thursday camp.
I am very conflicted about this.  Part of me is both very proud of her and excited for her.  She earned this camp. She got her butt up and sold cookies, walking around pulling her wagon or standing for hours in front of stores, to do it.  She also really wanted to go to camp.  She is excited about all the fun things she will get to do, and that makes me excite for her.
The rest of me, though, wishes I could have kept her home in my cocoon of safety.  I worry about her.  A lot.  She is very sensitive.  She is funny, and quirky.  She is fantastic.  Yet, like so many other kids, she just years to be accepted, and going into a huge group of people, that can be daunting.
She is also a vegetarian, and as a vegetarian, I know how hard it can be sometimes to find food at things like this.  On top of being a vegetarian, she is a picky vegetarian.  That doesn't set her up well for things like going off to camp where you eat what you are given.
Not only is there all of that going on, but she has never been away from home like this before.  In fact, in her 8 years of life, I can list for you every time she has been away from me at night.  There are of course the times I have been in the hospital, but she was home with MimMim and her Dad.  So, that doesn't count.  There is the one time that her father and I were fortunate enough to get a weekend away, but that also doesn't count because she was yet again with my mom.  Any time spent with Mim may as well count as being with me in her eyes.  Probably more fun in fact.  The only other time have been two nights that she got to sleep over at her Girl Scout leader's house for two different sleep overs.  Of course, as a co-leader, I was there right up until lights out both times.  Then, I was back first thing in the morning.  Not a whole lot of time without me.
So, I am worried about having her at a camp ground nearly two hours away.  I'm worried about everything.
I hope she gets to try new things, and make new friends.  I hope she learns something about herself along the way, and pulls some strength from inside to help her out in the times when she is sad or scared or what ever it may be.  Most importantly, I just hope she has a fantastic time, and makes memories that she will cherish for a life time.
To The Big One: I'll miss you!!  Be safe and have fun!!

We Did It!!!!!

Throughout this whole Girl Scout Cookie ordeal, we have had a goal.  One of the things we, as leaders, try to teach the girls is about goal setting, and planning to reach them.  When we sat down with our troop, the girls collectively decided that they wanted to sell 3,000 boxes.  That is a whole lotta cookies for 6 little girls.  We had them do the math, and that meant each girl needed to sell 500 boxes.  While there are lots of little prizes that the girls can earn for selling cookies, 500 boxes is the first big one.  When you hit 500, you get to go to camp.  Each of our girls wanted to do that.  They decided they could.  Honestly, I wasn't sure, but our leader said we could do it.  So, we all set our goals.

When I talked to The Big One alone about her goal, she was adamant that she wanted to hit 500.  She really, really wants to go to camp.  If we had to pay for a camp, they aren't cheap, either.  They are a few hundred dollars to start with for the cheaper camps.  So, if she wanted it, she would have to earn it.
She has worked really hard during all this.  She did walk-a-bouts with her cookie mobile wagon just about every weekend.  Sometimes more than once a weekend.  She did every booth sale we could get to.  The child has honestly worked for her goal.

Of course, her mother and father have worked pretty hard, too.  We are the ones going to the booth sales with her.  We have to take her one the walk-a-bouts.  In particular, her father has busted his rump moving cookies.  They have a new nickname for him at work in regards to selling cookies.  I don't want to post it, after all, I don't want to use that kind of language in relation to Girl Scouts, but I will say that he is being likened to a special kind of "working girl" who would sell cookies.  One variation of the two words in his nick name might both also have a double "o" vowel if you need yet another hint.  The point is not how crass the people he work with are though, in fact, they are realy to thank for supporting her.  So, if they want to call him some endearing term like that, I'll let them.

We had decided that we wouldn't focus on the prize throughout selling, but keeping her focused on her job, by not telling her how many cookies she had sold until the end.  We told her to work as hard as she could no matter what her progress.  We would tell her after everything was all said and done.
I was so nervous about trying to meet her goal, and I didn't want that for her.  The last weekend before booth sales, her leader and I decided to take a huge risk.  As I was counting up the sales we had left, and the number of boxes we had  to take to each one, I realized that the troop didn't have enough cookies for both of them to make it their goal.  So, I went and picked up 14 cases as the very last moment.
Half way through that weekend, I realized that she made her goal.  I started crying.  I do that a lot, I know, but I was so happy for her, and so proud of all the hard work.  I told My husband and thanked him for working so hard, too.  Together, we all did it.
I still wasn't going to tell her until the money was in, and the camp was selected, though.
Finally, yesterday I finished everything up.  Got my paperwork in, and money all done.  I submitted my report on what the girls earned, and selected their camp dates.  So, this morning, I showed her what she ended up at on the computer.  She read the screen, said the number out loud, and then started screaming, jumping in place, and then turning in circles all at once.  She was also chanting about going to camp.  It was awesome.  She and her friend who also sold enough to earn camp will be going together.  They may not get to be together in the same tent or cabin, but at least they will each have a friend at camp.
I'm thrilled.  She is thrilled.  I'm so excited that she earned her very first sleep away camp.  I know that this is something she will remember for the rest of her life.  I hope she loves camp, and cherishes the experience always.

Thank you to everyone out there who supported her, and really to anyone who bought cookies from any Girl Scout.  You have helped to make the day of not only The Big One, but many other happy kids out there.  The money you spent will go on to great thing, not just for camps, but community service projects that will hopefully make a difference in your own community.  You are all fantastic!

It is just cookies!!

Since my husband and I first got together, he has made fun of the Girl Scouts out selling their cookies every single year. "Ankle biters" he calls them. In truth, they are pretty zealous in their efforts to sell you a box of cookies. Then again, it seems like some people go crazy over the cookies? Why all the hype? It is just a box of cookies!!

Anyway, this year, our own child is now one of smock and vested throngs out selling cookies in their uniforms. She will not be selling at store fronts, due to age restrictions, thank goodness, but none the less, she is selling.

Now that we are in the thick of things, I am beginning to understand why the girls get to crazy about selling. I have often heard Mary Kay representatives as belonging to the "pink Bubble" where their world revolves around MK. Well, I suppose in this case, these girls are in the cookie bubble. There are pep rallies, cheers, songs, parties, you name it, they do it to get hyped up to sell. I find it a little disturbing, honestly.

The thing that I find the most disturbing, is that they are given prizes for selling. Now, don't get me wrong, I believe in teaching children that there is a reward for hard work, but we are talking about selling cookies here, not mowing the lawn. The prizes are really crazy, too. This year, if you sell 2009 boxes of cookies, you get a helicopter ride. Yes. A real one. I believe that this is a lunch with the Girl Scout CEO, and a ride in a helo at the Operation Thin Mint kick off. That would actually be pretty cool. In fact, I think that last year they used a military helicopter for part of it, which would be super cool since her Daddy flies in helicopters for the military. Of course, it would be a little odd to watch her in a helo like his, with him being half way around the world, but I think I am How realistic is that for most girls? How do you sell that many boxes of cookies? If I had Donald Trump on my speed dial, or anyone who could afford just under 8k in cookies, I would be all over this, but alas, I don't.

So, we are going to be very realistic about all of this. We are going to set a reasonable goal for our first year selling, and I am going to show her how that hard work and dedication can also be paid off by knowing that you have done the best you can, and being proud of yourself, even without a helicopter ride.

Unless, any of you happen to have the Donald's number, and you wouldn't mind passing it on.

And, of course, if anyone wants to buy some cookies, please let me know. For just 95 more boxes, she can get a t-shirt. Then, when her dad comes home, I'll put her in the t-shirt, take her to his work, take a pic of her in the t-shirt in his helicopter, and call it a day. Hey, when you have the hook up, you have the hook up.