Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Snip, Snip

My oldest daughter has beautiful, long blonde hair. It is that gorgeous light blonde that people pay serious money for. I love it. She loves it.

Yesterday, though, she cut it.

I picked her up from school, and as I was loading her into the car, I see this big cut across her hair. I start to look, and there are two sections, one on either side of her face, cut!!

Now, she had already accidentally cut a small piece of hair on Sunday. We were doing homework, cutting out pictures from a newspaper, and she wasn't paying attention. She let her hair get under the paper, and her safety scissors just snipped right through all of it. I'm sure that was still floating around in her mind.

What I saw while loading her, though, was about 3 times the amount of the accidental cut.
I ask her who cut it.

Who is someone?

"I don't remember."

That was when i gave her the "You have one chance to tell me the absolute truth, and if you don't the punishment for lying in addition." speech.

She fessed up.

"Ok, ok. I did it. We didn't have a sniping project today, and I wanted my hair shorter so I snipped it."

Just like that.

So, now it is shorter, at least in sections. Part of her punishment is that I am not fixing what she did right away. She cut it. So, she can walk around with some funky hair for a couple of days.

Then, on Saturday, the most traumatic thing of all, she is getting a hair cut. See, she doesn't really want short hair. She cried, and cried when I told her I was going to cut her hair. My husband threatened to Sinead O'Connor if it ever happened again. Now, I'm not down with that, and I promptly have him the look when he said it. However, I am going to have to take off about 2 to 3 inches to even out what she did. Maybe more. I hope not. Either way, I know she is going to be really, really upset to see her hair go. I hope she really learns her lesson with just this one cut.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Papa the Sub

My daughter had a substitute in school again Monday. This time, they couldn't get even the sub that thinks my daughter has "quite the personality". Instead, Lilly comes home telling us all about Papa. You see, that's what he told the kids to call him, because he is a grandfather. No really. He did.

Let me back up for a minute and tell you that first off, they didn't even have a sub for a few hours. In the morning, they split the entire class up and distributed them to other Kindergarten classes. Thankfully, Lilly got into on of the other rooms that I like.

When they finally got someone to sub, they brought all the kids back to their own class, with Papa. Now, I'm not ok with the name. I am glad he has grand kids, but my child isn't one of them. She has no reason be calling her teacher Papa. In fact, I told her that if she was ever in that situation again, she needed to tell the sub that she would like to call him by a more respectful name, ask his (or her) last name, then call them Mr. or Ms. Whatever. I mean, what was wrong with this guy? This isn't story time at the local library, here. This is school.

So, then I ask her, what did you do after you got back to your class.

Nothing?? Really? Now, I don't know about you, but it has been my experience that if you don't give 5 and 6 year old kids something to do, they will find something, and it won't be what you want. Usually, that means they find and create chaos. Utter chaos. In this case, that is exactly what happened. Their real teacher was back today, even though she is still ill, and she was shocked at the state of the room. She said that there are markers and glue pens everywhere, all with caps off. There is trash, and stuff just thrown all over the room. I feel bad for her. Here she is sick, and this is what she comes back to. A room full of chaos created by 20 5 or 6 year olds, and the 5 or 6 year olds that did it. Man.

After a lot of questions, Lilly did tell us that they sang some songs, and he told them all about how he used to be a Captain in the U.S. Navy. He said he was really worried about who was going to take over his ship when he retired.


He didn't end the day well, either. First, there was some nonsense at the end of the day about all the kids being "guilty". I couldn't really understand exactly what seemed to have happened, but I think some of the kids told him that they got out of school earlier than they did. Now, whether they were confused or trying to trick him, I don't know, but he told the kids they were all guilty, even if they were not involved with the trickery.

His final poor judgement call was telling the kids that he wasn't ever going to come back because they were mean to him. According to my daughter, he then proceeded to fake cry.

Actually she said "Then he started to cry, but I think he was faking it because I looked and looked at his eyes, and I didn't see one tear."

You call out that big weird faker, Pook.

I talked to some other parents, and there were other stories. I feel that there is enough to warrant talking to the principal about it. I don't think Papa needs to come back to the class. Maybe he should stick to ships. The ships won't care if he fake cries.

You know, were not doing well with subs this year. So far, 2 out of 3 have had issues, or I have issues with them. Either way, not a good average for San Diego schools, or our kids.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Kiddie Formals

My daughter's elementary school had a formal dance tonight. You read that correctly. I did use the words elementary, school, formal, and dance in the same sentence on purpose. Not only did the school have a formal, but it was for all grades, K-5 together.

Now, please, someone tell me if I am the only parent out there that thinks this is a little on the wrong side. If the dance were a father/daughter type deal for the little ones, I could see that. However, a dance? A formal dance for 5 year olds? Some of those kids may have even just barely turned 5. I just don't get it.

I find the whole thing a bit absurd and even a little vulgar. I know that some of the 5th graders are going as couples, and I think it is totally in appropriate for the school to expose the little ones to that in a dance setting as well. Don't we already over sexualize our children these days, and over expose them to those kinds of things? Why should the school encourage that behaviour?

In fact, when it was planned by the PTO, they intended to have it be a full on chaperoned dance that you could drop your child off at.

The kids bought tickets for the dance. They were to get their pictures taken when they got in, and then they had refreshments. Well, they served the kids hot chocolate and nachos. Again, you read that correctly. They served kids in formal clothes nachos.

I told a friend of mine about it, and that they sold tickets. She pro ceded to ask how much the hotel rooms for after were also. See, she was making the point of how I feel; Five year old children do not need to be at a dance where other kids are going as a couple.

The worst part, though, is that my daughter is the one who gets the raw deal out of it. A lot of her little friends are going. She isn't. All day Friday, she and I kept getting ask if she were going during the pick up and drop off at school. I told her we would do something else special, but of course, she feels left out. I can't tell you how much that upsets me as a parent, to be the one who makes a choice that causes my child to feel left out.

I know that as her parent, I will make decisions that won't be popular with her, and apparently some times even other parents. I have to stick to my gut, though, and my gut says this isn't a good thing. If it starts now, where will it go, and where will it end? I choose to keep her on the straight and narrow path. It may be more difficult, but it leads to a better place. At least, I hope it does.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Quite the Personality

My daughter had a substitute today. This is the second time that this particular sub has been with them. The first time was a little chaotic, but it ended up ok. Not the sub's fault. It was the school. The kids really like her, and that is what counts, I guess.

Well, my husband goes to pick her up today. With a sub, you have to go to the door, tell them who you are there for, and sign them out. So he tells Ms. Sub that he is there for The Big One.

She looks at him, and says "Lilly has quite the personality".

Seriously? What does that mean? My husband didn't ask what she meant and now I don't know. Was that supposed to be a compliment, or a criticism saying that she is difficult? Her regular teacher doesn't have discipline problems out of her, and she is a pretty good kid in general.

Now, don't get me wrong, I know my daughter can be a ham. She can also be bossy, but is hilarious, caring, incredibly intelligent, strong willed, and loyal. She likes to show random people her "dance moves". She will make up a song about anything, any where. Really I think she is about everything I would want in my own child, and maybe a little more.

So, yes, I suppose she does have quite the personality. No matter what that womyn thinks, I'm going to call it a good thing, and roll with it.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

How Much Up Can One Kid Chuck?

Sometimes, you have to wonder how so much of anything fits in those little bodies. Whether it be food going in, or coming out in any form, sometimes it amazes me.

Tonight, my oldest daughter got sick. I mean sick. The poor thing was asleep on the couch, by 7:30 no less which is a serious indicator in my child, she suddenly rolled over and starting ralphing her guts up.

Now, I will spare you most of the details, and trust me it was bad. However, I have to tell you that I am amazed by the volume that came out. I just don't see where that all came from. The space that kids are able to cover when they vomit is just mind blowing sometimes. Where does it all come from? Well, I know where it comes from, but I still can't understand how so much volume comes from such a little person!!

She isn't big. In fact, bearing no body shape resemblance to her mother at all, she is actually pretty skinny. So, how does someone so skinny nearly destroy one couch pillow, my entire living room floor, the bathroom floor mats, and cause me to need to clean the toilet?? I just don't get that.

I happened to snap a shot of her not long before the incident. There she is, showing off the offending tummy. She had told us it hurt before she went to sleep.

Bless her heart, she went straight back to sleep, and I hope she feels better when she wakes up. I think she has to. There can't be anything left in there to make her feel bad. = ( Feel better, Pook.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Next Bathroom, Please

The sign reads:
This restroom is currently closed to maintain the cleanliness level until our guests arrive. Please use any of the other bathrooms in the house until after our guests are gone. Anyone caught using this bathroom until the allotted time will be directed to speak with Momma.

Ok. I don't really have that sign, but I want one.

Why is it that right after you clean the bathroom guests use, someone slips by you, uses the bathroom, and instantly makes it unrepresentable?? I swear to you all that I bleached my bathroom down, late, late last night after everyone went to bed. In fact, it was around midnight when I was done. At lunch time today, I went into the bathroom to change the trash, the last thing I needed to do, and low and behold, I find a big chunk of poop in my rug. You read that right. Poop. There is poop on the wall. There is poop everywhere. I can't believe it. I seriously can't believe it. I just cleaned that thing!!

So, from here on out, let it be known that any person who lives in my house, may no longer use the guest restroom on any day that guests are expected until the time after they leave. The proclamation shall stand forever more, or until we move into a house that has no guest rest room, which ever comes first.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Ever have a touched by an angel moment?

You know those moment where something happens, and by some struck of luck, or whatever, you are spared some terrible woe in the nick of time?

Something like this:

Thanksgiving evening, I was helping to male supper at my brother's house. I was going to make potato casserole. I ask him to get me a large baking dish out before I started. He gets out one of his,probably my moms really, Pyrex dishes, and sits it on the stove since we are out of counter space. No one else is in the kitchen but me, nor have they been for a while.

I start working on the casserole. I get to the point that I need pepper. I look on the counters and in the cabinets, and can't find it. I just turned around to yell into the family room for him to tell me where the pepper is. Just as I turn around, BOOM! The Pyrex dish explodes into my back. I don't mean it cracked or broke into pieces, I mean it exploded into a million tiny shards and was completely unrecognizable. It was everywhere. We had to move the stove, and throw tons of things away.

This isn't my video, but it does look like my brother's kitchen after the explosion and will give you an idea of how scary it was.

I felt a ton of it hit me in the back. Thankfully, I was wearing 2 shirts and jeans. It only hit my back and some of the backs of my legs. I was so incredibly lucky. Had I not turned at just the right moment, it would have shattered in my face.

We later realized that my little sister, who hadn't been cooking for at least 20 minutes, had left the stove eye on, and neither of us saw it. We were all petty lucky not one of the kids was burned, either.

I have had a few of those moments in my life, where I know that someone was looking out for me. It makes me think that there really is a purpose for my life, and I need to be here for something special.

Those moments are gifts in so many ways. They make you appreciate your life, family, and the fact that you are who you are with a chance to be in this world and hopefully do some good.

So, to whomever is watching over me, Thank you. I appreciate you being there when the dish broke, I took the wrong subway train, I flipped the car, and every other moment I am not mentioning here. I promise to do my best to find and fullfill what ever it is that I still need to do here. I hope you are always there looking after me, and my family too. Thank you again.

Shaving Moratorium Part 2

In case anyone was concerned, more for my husband than me, of course, I just wanted to let you know that the shaving moratorium ended as promised, once we returned. I no longer need that extra warmth, and in fact remember that I really prefer to have nice smooth legs year round.

Ahhh..the benefits of living in gloriously expensive So Cal.