Wednesday, November 12, 2008

My House Smells like Garlic.

My house smells like garlic.

I am normally a freak about house smells. I have scented things everywhere. Before I have people come over, I turn on my special hand made tart warmer to make the whole house smell like fresh apple pie, orange blossom, or whatever my current scent is. I have reed diffusers in my bathrooms. I actually do place dryer sheets under my couch cushions to make the house smell cleaner.

It isn't that my house doesn't smell good, its just a thing. Ya know. I want you to walk in and feel welcome by the scent.

Right now, you wouldn't so much walk in and be welcome by the scent as much as knocked over by the stench.

My oldest daughter has developed a fear of Dracula since Halloween. Its a big time fear that is giving her nightmares and really hindering her. She doesn't even want to go up to her bedroom without me out of fear.

Now, she isn't usually like this. We have talked to her, and tried to comfort her. We tried about every rational, normal thing we could think of.

I had a few friends suggest monster spray. You know, special scented water in a bottle that she could keep by her bed. I thought she would be a little old to buy into that whole thing.

Then, tonight when I was cooking, it hit me. I was about out of garlic powder. I used most of it in her special favorite soup that I made for the girls tonight. Setting down the empty bottle was an "Ah HA!" moment. You know, one of those where you feel like you should have a light bulb in a bubble over your head. General monster spray might not work, but everyone knows garlic keeps vampires away.

I called my daughter over to the kitchen counter, and showed her the garlic. We talked about what it does to vampires.

"Vampires are allergic to garlic, right?"
Since she has an allergy, she put it in terms that she could understand.

"Sure. It is something like an allergy, and they can't be anywhere near it." I confirmed.

So, we filled the nearly empty bottle of garlic powder with water. I told her to we would take it up to her room, and sprinkle some around. Then, we would sit the bottle on her bed. Nothing could come near it, I assured her again.

From that moment on, the bottle was like a life line. She started carrying it up and down the stairs. Now, normally, I wouldn't encourage these things, but when my 5 year old has refused to sleep alone for a over a week, at some point, we have to start working on this from one angle or another.

After bath time, we went to the girls' room. I took the lid off, and tried to pretend to sprinkle water around the room. Let me also say that while the bottle was nearly empty, it wasn't empty enough. That bottle reeked of garlic. That water was saturated with it. Ugg. Lilly was watching me closely. In the closet, I could pretend. When I moved into her bedroom, though, she started watching too closely. If she didn't see the water coming out, it wasn't enough. Needless to say, I had to really sprinkle her whole room with garlic water.

Just to put the whole thing over the top, I reminded her that I had fed her the rest of the garlic. So, it was all inside her too.

"Oh! So no vampire can even come near me now!" She said triumphantly. I would suppose no one had ever been so glad for garlic body oder, but hey, if that was what it took, so be it.

Well, all that garlic took its toll on my wonderfully smell;y house. My house is still smelly, just not the same way. You can smell the garlic the moment you hit the second floor. It is a little rough up there.

I warned my husband before he even came home not to question the garlic bottle. Let it stay with her until she has a little time to get over this. We can shampoo her carpets in a few weeks.
Until then, I just have to remind everyone that that I know to simply ignore any garlic smell from either my home,or my child. Just consider it a reminder that we are still vampire free.