Thursday, October 7, 2010

So Many Wives, So Little Time

I will be honest, much like ashamedly admitting I used to watch Flavor Of Love, I have to tell you that I have started watching Sister Wives. Somehow, I think the two are about in the same category.
I'm not sure why I watch. Perhaps I am trying to figure this whole thing out, but honestly, it just kind of makes for a good train wreck.

There are somethings that really bother me. It made my skin crawl when the father, Kody, sat right there as wife number something or other told him she felt like she was losing her best friend because he wanted to bring in another wife. He admitted that he was causing his existing wives pain, but went ahead with everything anyway.

Now I'm pretty sure that doing things you know would hurt the ones you supposedly love does not make for being a good husband. Not only that, but isn't three enough? Does he need a different bedroom for every night of the week? And gross, while we are on that subject. Who washes all those sheets. Ick. I'll stop there.

With all the publicity they have been getting, I have actually given this whole thing a lot of thought. I have been able to find a few positives in their relationship quagmire, though that surprised me.

It hit me, that if you have really low self esteem, this is the perfect relationship for you. He will never leave you. He may add another wife if he gets tired of you, but you will always be there, sharing a bed at least occasionally as his duty requires.

Built in babysitters. Now, that makes even me consider this. Part of this whole "Sister Wife" concept is that you are one big family, and you help take care of each other's children, who are all brothers and sisters anyway. So, if I need to go out, if I just need to get away, I could just go. That sounds too fabulous to be true. Of course, it really is, because it all comes back to the catch, sharing Daddy. And I'm just not down with that.

While there may be some positives, when I think about it, I always end up with way more cons than pros. This isn't for me. Ever. There are just too many things I don't think I could agree with.

What if I really, really wanted some "quality time" and it wasn't my night? Do I just have to wait? No thank you. I think that is something that comes with the ring. When you are single and alone, you have to plan for sex. Not when you are married. Well, maybe a little when you have small children and you have to work around them and getting them in bed, but otherwise, really, it should be pretty much available when both partners are interested in the least.

Nor do I think I could handle all those kids in one house. It would drive me beyond batty. My mom is one of twelve children. Let me hit you with that again just so you can believe it. My mom is 1 of 12 children, and no they aren't Mormon. I have seen her family. I know how crazy you end up when you have a house full of siblings. My mom was lucky enough to be one of the oldest and escape the asylum at a young age.

Not only that, but when it comes right down to it, I really believe in the old adage "What's good for the goose is good for the gander", a simple statement of equality. This show is the exact opposite of that. No matter what else I have a problem with, that is a deal breaker right there.

Maybe this lifestyle really works for them. Maybe some of the wives were raised that way, and just don't know another way of life. I suppose as long as no one is really being abused or hurt, then whatever they want is peachy keen with me. As long as I'm not the one missing out when I want my snuggle time, more power to them, and their really big, combined family.


buttafly said...

I admit I've been watching too. Mostly because they're in Utah and everyone thinks all Utahns and Mormons are polygamists. And I love "Big Love" so I was curious to see the real life ones. I always saw "pligs" when I went to the amusement park in Utah, but all I knew was that they all had long braided hair and wore homemade dresses that covered every inch!